June 07, 2010

Extra Large

So much of our lives are focused on numbers and letters. The scale reveals our weight; the tags on our clothes tell the size of our waists. I used to be ashamed of those numbers and letters in the sixth grade. I was eleven years old, two hundred and one pounds, and one of three fat girls in class. I remember using Wite-Out to camouflage the size on the clothing label just in case my tag popped out of my neckline during recess. I’d even remove tags with bright orange scissors or my small, chubby hands to avoid seeing them on a daily basis.
I made my way back to XL thirteen years later. But this time I was not embarrassed nor was I ashamed to say hello. I embraced the size with open arms because I know my self-worth is not determined by letters on labels or digits on a scale.
XL is no longer an enemy, but an ally. XL reminds me that while I am fat, I am also fabulous. Welcome back, XL, my closet missed you.

23 comments:

  1. Does this mean you went to Kohl's again or was this one of the shirts you bought when we went. I can't remember. Either way, it looks good. So does the tri tip in the pics. LOL =)

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  2. I was like that and I've now learnt to embrace it! I wish I could find my jeggings right now xxxx

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  3. Love this post. I've been fat since I was little and there was so much shame in the size of my clothes that I did the same exact thing. When I'd go shopping, I'd hide the size of the tags while walking around the store and before and after going into the fitting room. No one but myself could know that I, too, was an XL. I wish I knew then what I know now... that we are extra extra fabulous!

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  4. love this post.
    you look beautiful! :)

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  5. I love this post. I remember I'd always single myself out in school and I'd always see if I was the fattest one there! It was so sad, but today it makes no difference and I dont do it anymore, I may be the fattest in class today but I'll be one damn hot looking fatty lol =)

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  6. I love this post too. I used to lie about my size and hide tags too and I'm still too chicken to step on a weighing scale!

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  7. That shirt is so cute on you! I love your makeup. xo

    http://www.pearlslaceandruffles.com/

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  8. Love the necklace, I wooild hearts are my favorite shape.
    >,<
    Katorra
    www.ondahanger.com

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  9. Goodness, who hasn't done what you described? I used to see girls in high school do the exact same thing and they were mediums! They didn't want to admit to the world that they weren't a small...

    It's so frustrating that fat people aren't treated the same way. I read a study saying that fat people are discriminated against by DOCTORS who think we don't respond to treatment and that our sole goal in life is to be fat... I'm sorry, but not everyone can be 120lbs and 5'10".

    Sorry for the rant, I just was in a mood :)

    Again, I love how you rock the stripes. I did a post on them yesterday and I have to say that all the fabulous fatshionistas need to embrace them!

    Thanks for a fabulous post as usual!!

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  10. @ Mandy, this is a shirt from Kohl's, but its from last weekend when I went with another friend. Are you taking me back there when I see you next? lol

    @ xladx, I'm happy you've learned to embrace your body! P.S. Jeggings are amazing!

    @ Olivia, OMG. I used to hide tags while shopping, too. I remember shopping for clothes at Target and placing my hand over the size label on the hanger because I didn't want anyone to see it. We'll have no more of that because we are extra fabulous!

    @ Case, thank you!! <3

    @ Mayra, I feel you! I still scour every room to see if I'm the only fat girl. And if I am, so what? I don't let that hinder my confidence or ability to do well and be me!

    @ LuAnne, Wow, I'm so surprised so many of you have done the same thing. I don't know why I was always under the impression I went through situations like that growing up. Its so great to know I wasn't/am not alone thanks to our amazing fatshion community! <3

    @ pearlslaceandruffles, thank you! I haven't worn purple + gold shadow in months so it was a nice change for once. :)

    @ Katorra, aren't hearts the best? They're one of my favorite things to wear!

    @ cocomabelle, no need to apologize for the "rant." It never crossed my mind that non-fat girls would do such a thing. It seems completely unnecessary. Then again, fat girls hiding tags is also unnecessary. Thank you for sharing!

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  11. I agree with you 100%! Be proud of what you are, I think everyone should. As long as you have confidence, nothing else should matter.

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  12. It is hard but I try to look at how clothes fit and look instead of the size. Looks like a fun summer day. Cute

    http://bigsizeonasmallbudget.blogspot.com/

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  13. I always feel bewildered when I might have to try a smaller size... like someone is playing a trick on me... I am a 2XL. I kind of like the 2... You look fab here, BTW. x.

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  14. amanda ... ure am AMAZING lady u know that? and A-DO-RA-BLE to pieces! love ya!

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  15. I just discovered your blog and I love it! Your style is lovely and awesome. You are sooooo pretty!
    DC
    xx

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  16. You look gorgeous, and so cute with the spatula! :) I believe that the size on a tag means nothing--it's about how you feel when you wear the item that determines what you look like!

    Loved this. <33333

    xo Allison :)

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  17. I love this post! I finally stopped caring about sizes recently, it's nice to buy something that fits well and not feel bad about the size.

    Also, new to your blog, and loving it!

    Sarah @ Return to Sender
    http://www.tabayag.com

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  18. You always remain inspirational. Love the pic! Great color on you.

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  19. Amanda,

    Love reading your blog. I respect people who are positive minded!

    It is our own right to be proud of ourself. Being a plus size is not bad at all ! If we don't appreciate ourself, who else ?

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  20. good for you :) be proud of who you are.

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  21. Totally relate to this one. Would also say I was a smaller size than I was.

    Go shopping in the regular sized shops with friends and just say oh there's nothing I like, when it was there's nothing that will fit.

    I just don't care anymore, I don't care what others think, my fat ass wont be fitting in a size 6 in this life time so why hide it!

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  22. @ Jen, confidence is the best accessory!

    @ C, I've learned to do the same, too. It really isn't about the number but rather the fit of the clothes and how you feel in them.

    @ Em, Vanity sizing is ridiculous! If one bases their worth on sizing, vanity sizing is a guaranteed way to mess with their head. I may do a more in depth post on this soon.

    @ BBM, Awww, stop it!! Thanks girl. <3

    @ DC, welcome to my blog and thank you so much! I appreciate the kinds words. :)

    @ Allison, you're very right! P.S. Do you think I should make this spatula one of my regular accessories? Lol.

    @ Sarah, welcome to my blog, too! Its definitely nice to not care about the size. Once you stop caring, a whole world of self-acceptance just opens up!

    @ Elana, I love purple! I think it looks great on me, lol. Thank you for the comment, friend. <3

    @ Arisyia, Good point. If we don't appreciate ourselves, how will we be ever to really live a full life?!

    @ Jai, most definitely!

    @ BB, I also used to say I was a smaller size and say/do the same things with friends while shopping. It was a twisted way of fitting in AND making myself feel better. I finally got tired of lying to them and myself. Now I could care less if anyone knows my size or what-have-you. Like I said, that does not determine who I am and what I'm capable of doing!

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  23. I'm new to your blog but I have to say that was a great post! I've learned that it's not the size of clothes, it's what makes a person feel comfortable and confident.
    Bella
    http://gypsyroxylee.wordpress.com/

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